Coyness in Indian society is a quality commendable in women. There is a general belief that a shy, reserved woman speaks volumes of the way she has been brought up and of the family she belongs to. And there seems to be nothing more lovable and more beautiful than a shy woman in love in the Indian society. There is a sense of feminine aura about this trait, shyness.
Women have always been reserved and secretive about their relationship in the Indian society or so it has been believed. If movies mirror the society, then a trip down memory lane of Bollywood will bring forth pictures of shy, smitten, distressed heroines unable to express their love. Then, romance blossomed in eye-contacts, blushes, never-ending wait for the lover to say the three words, secret letters, friends playing the cupid, promises and then marriages. Pre-marital relationship between a man and a woman was a topic seldom discussed, forget about getting into it. Considered a sensitive topic, it was not very becoming of a woman to be candid about her relationship, and if ever she did, it would threaten to put her in bad light. Such restrictions on display of emotions eventually made women extremely conscious and shy about their love life.
But things have changed now.
Women today are ready to open up, explore, experiment every facet of her life. They have shaken off the fear of ‘what would people say’. The dating scenario is changing and women are not only screaming ‘yes’ but are also proposing their love, taking guys out on dates, dumping guys, double-dating and taking men by surprise! Today, very few women are likely to waste their time and energy harping on the past after a break-up. With women going places and social networking mushrooming, finding a partner had never been so easy.
“If one knows that the Mr. Right is there right in front of you, why waste time waiting for him to ask you out, and most of all why let other girls get a chance? ” says Kamini Kataria, a third year college student.
Woman wooing man is no longer an out-of-the-box act. Sudhanshu Vats, a software engineer in a reputed firm says, “During my college years, I was proposed by two of my classmates and believe me that was a good feeling. I respect them for the courage, they had to come up to a guy and express their feelings. Time indeed is changing and I am sure it is for the good.”
These sea changes might be because women are educated, aware of her surroundings, needs and desires, and also because they are financially independent. Or most important of all, perhaps the society is not so hostile as it earlier was towards love affairs. Cultural boundaries are dissolving fast and there seems to be no room left to hold on to age-old traditions and practices. For instance, women are shaking off their inhibitions about live-in relationships. And with many young couples going in for it, the Indian society has no choice but to learn to come to terms with it.
But no matter how huge the change seems, the new will always remain the offshoot of the old. Women indeed have become way smarter and bold than their mothers and grandmothers but, lingering within them is still today the desire to be taken care of, of being wooed and of being the only woman in her man’s heart.